Why am i attracted to gay men

Bookstelevision shows and feature-length films have all highlighted this unique relationship, noted for its closeness and depth. As a researcher in social psychology, I've often wondered: Why do straight female-gay male relationships work so well? Archived post.

For the first study, I wanted to replicate the finding that women trust gay men more than straight men or straight women. Why am I attracted to gay men much more than straight men? New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast.

In other words, because gay men are attracted to their own gender, they're a "safe bet" for women—at least, from a sociobiological standpoint. The experiments, published in the journal Evolutionary Psychologydemonstrated that straight women and gay men perceived one another to be trustworthy sources of relationship and dating advice.

For years, friendships between straight women and gay men have been a subject of pop culture fascination. The female participants were then asked how likely they would be to trust the individual's dating advice.

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This article first appeared on The Conversation. About three years ago, I initially tested this theory in a series of experiments that have served as the foundation of my research program on gay-straight relationships. Gay male friends often provide women a window into how the minds of men work.

At first glance, this explanation may seem quite counterintuitive. This time, however, I wanted to see if women would only trust gay men's dating-related advice as opposed to other types of advice. In these experiments, straight female participants were shown fictitious Facebook profiles depicting either a straight woman, straight man or gay man.

I also recruited gay male participants, and had them complete the same task with the gay men viewing Facebook profiles depicting a straight female, gay male or lesbian female. Recently, my colleagues and I at the University of Texas at Arlington developed a series of four related studies.

In other words, when it came to dating-related matters, there was an almost instantaneous level of implicit trust. Many women are attracted to the fearlessness and lack of self-consciousness in gay men. With heterosexual men who, by definition, are sexually attracted to womenthe process is longer—and potentially more fraught—because men may be grappling with their own sexual impulses.

With heterosexual men (who, by definition, are sexually attracted to women), the process is longer—and potentially more fraught—because men may be grappling with their own sexual impulses. Because gay men don't mate with women—or compete with them for mates—women feel a certain level of comfort with gay men, and the process of forming a close friendship can occur relatively quickly.

After all, straight women and gay men don't mate with one another. Specifically, I believe evolutionary psychology and human mating can help explain why relationships between straight women and gay men tend to flourish. But now I am attracted to men more again but like, only gay men.

Why are straight women so drawn to having gay men as friends? And when do these relationships typically form?

why am i attracted to gay men

However, this is precisely the reasoning behind my approach. We titled the four studies "Why and When Straight Women Trust Gay Men: Ulterior Mating Motives and Female Competition," with the hope of better establishing why straight women trust gay men and when straight women would be most likely to seek out gay men for friendship and guidance.

But with society's attitudes toward gays and lesbians changing, it's become all the more important to build a holistic understanding of the relationships between gay and straight people. But it’s also like it’s constantly changing! I’m just so confused.

During the course of my research, I've discovered that the most interesting, compelling—and, arguably, most theoretically coherent—explanation is through the lens of evolution.